DrollyJokes.com

What do you call an Amish man on the side of the road, with his hand up a
horse’s ass?
A mechanic.

Have you heard about the man who did it with a parakeet?
He contracted chirpes and the worst thing?

It was untweetable.

One afternoon, this guy drives down a highway to visit a nearby lake and
relax. On his way to the lake, a guy dressed from head to toe in red standing on
the side of the highway gestures for him to stop.

The first guy rolls down the window and says, “How can I help you?”

“I am the red jerk of the highway. You got something to eat?”

With a...

Continue reading »

Thanksgiving Day was approaching, and a family had received a Thanksgiving
card with a painting of a pilgrim family on its way to church. Grandma showed
the card to her small grandchildren, observing, “The pilgrim children liked to
go to church with their mothers and fathers.” “Oh, yeah?” her grandson replied,
“so why is their dad carrying that...

Continue reading »

As a crowded airliner is about to take off, the peace is shattered by a
5-year-old boy who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter
what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, the boy
continues to scream furiously and kick the seats around him.

Suddenly, from the rear of the plane, an elderly man in the uniform of an Air
Force...

Continue reading »

This fellow who had spent his whole life in the desert comes to visit a
friend. He’d never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the
middle of the RR tracks one day, he hears this whistle — Whooee da Whoee! —
but doesn’t know what it is. Predictably, he’s hit — but, only a glancing blow
– and is thrown, head-over-heels,...

Continue reading »

One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New
Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, George W.
Bush, the Dali Lama, and a hippie. Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator
exploded loudly in the luggage compartment, and the passenger cabin began to
fill with smoke. The cockpit door opened, and the pilot burst into the...

Continue reading »

What do Isakoff and Ice Cream have in common?
Both get scooped regularly

Q: What’s the mating call of the redhead?
A: “Next!”

An Anagram, as you all know, is a word or phrase made by transposing or
rearranging the letters of another word or phrase. The following are
exceptionally clever. Someone out there either has way too much time to waste or
is deadly at Scrabble. When you rearrange the letters:
Dormitory ……………………………. Dirty Room...

Continue reading »

Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he
has to take a dump. “well, go in the bushes.”

“what should i use to wipe my ass?”
“use a dollar bill.”

a few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s*** all over his
hands.

“what happened?” asks his friend.

“i...

Continue reading »